Resurrection

Soooo....I realize it's been nearly 10 months since I last made an update, but since I feel like I need an outlet to "vent" or share or whatever you would like to call it, I figured here would be a good place, so in that, the blog has been resurrected!!!

I'll try to keep my recap of the 2010 season brief! So here it is: 42 races (road/cross combined), 4 victories, multiple podiums, a lot of 5th place finishes and an upgrade to a Cat 2 on the road! Not a bad year on the bike and I have a feeling I haven't peaked yet as a rider, so more fun to come! Highlights: 2nd at Day 2 Tulsa Tough in my biggest field yet, of 69 Cat 3/4 women... 1st in Women's Open at St. Johns Powerful Medicine Crit on my "home turf" in Springfield, MO and then wrapped up my season with a pretty dominate Gateway Cup! My goal was 1st at Days 1 and 3 and podium on days 2 and 4 and then walk away first overall with the leaders jersey! Well...guess what? 1st - Day 1, 2nd - Day 2, 1st- Day 3, 5th - Day 4 AND after I got that Leader's Jersey on Day 1 I never gave it up!!! What a great way to end my road season and my last races as a Cat 3!!!

After that...lets see....Adam and I took off to Tulum, for a much needed Mexican vacation!!! And just in case you hadn't caught the pics on his blog or on my FB, it's gorgeous! Such a great time..I think we would both love to go back! Following the road season, I took a little bit of time off the bike, as well as just some easy riding. My fitness hurt because of it in the first part of the cross season, but I ended the season well and am now ready for the road (or I think so, at least)!

Oh and if you didn't pick up on it, Adam and I are still together...yes, almost 14 months later from our first date on NYE 09'!

So about everything else....well, about a year ago I quickly proclaimed "28 is great" with the idea that 2010 was going to be an incredible year for me...maybe the best yet! Well, sometimes when you least expect it, things happen, good and bad and this year was one of those years, unfortunately, this time "bad" rather than "good". Before I get into that, I don't want to down play the great things...because clearly, there were some great things in my 28th year of life....1st falling in love with Adam - who is not only my boyfriend, but truly my best friend, 2nd I gained a wonderful roommate, who has also become one of my best friends (Andrea), 3rd - clearly I had a great season on the bike and 4th I feel so fortunate to still have a job in this tough economy that allows me to live and also feed my addiction (aka bike racing)...even though I have continued to look for a new job/career that I feel would better suit me and my strengths!

However, getting back to the "bad" things that just happen in life...well, after nearly 30 years of marriage, my parents are getting divorced! I know so so many, TOO many, people go through it, but that doesn't make it any easier and I don't care how old you are when it happens it's never easy. And whomever came up with the idea of "staying together for the kids" is a bunch of bullshit, because I will tell you, when all you have known is your parents together, fighting for it, better or worse and you learn that marriage is a lifetime commitment and then all of a sudden someone pulls the rug out from under you, you begin to question all you have known and seen through the years. And in this particular case, my case, I've really questioned who my father is, who I thought he was and who he has become. You see, my father, Paul Dock, left my Mom for his secretary. And to add insult to injury, by stepping outside of his marriage, it was with his 30something year old secretary, Angela. And in her short 38 years of life she has managed to wreck both her previous marriages by cheating and has now wrecked at least two other marriages (that I'm aware of), including my parents... I don't know about you, but at my place of work, we call those women "home wreckers". And I haven't quite decided who I feel more sorry for, her 9 year old son who is probably completely confused by why Mommy's "old" (taken straight from the horse's mouth) boss now lives with them, my Mom - who's life has been turned upside down or for my Dad, who is inevitably going to be taken for all that he's got (and I'm not talking about from the divorce agreement) and in the mean time, has destroyed his relationship with multiple people and most importantly me. You see, Paul has been more than just my Dad through the years, he's been my very biggest supporter, my best friend, my encourager, my biggest fan, we have ALWAYS had a special bond that so many of my friends have been envious of through the years and overall he's been a man I've been so proud to call me "Daddy".......until now. Bless his heart, he always wants to see the very best in people - he always has, but with that comes a price, you get taken for granted, because he's straight up gullible and I feel quite confident that, this is how this "home wrecker" has turned him into someone I no longer know. I have a really hard time believing that he's been faking who he is for the first 28 years of my life and the real him is now coming out, maybe I'm wrong, but I can say this with confidence, he is NOT the man that raised me and I knew for the first 28 years of my life. My Dad taught me a lot and a big part of that was being a good/honest person and I think my moral character proves that, the things he has done and become are not with good moral character, that I know. Its so absolutely disappointing, frustrating, sad and has made me very angry. But not that long ago I remember a conversation we were having and he said I was "resilient" and that he "always admired that in me." Well, by God, he's right about that. With or without him in my life, I will be just fine! At least I had a father the first 28 years of my life, that's more than a lot of people can say.

So you may ask, why would I talk about this on my blog? Well, for a few reasons...if you know me well and have noticed over the past 8-9 months I haven't been my normal cheery self, here's an explanation and a very small idea as to what I've been dealing with, another being if someone asks or wonders what has happen to my Dad or why my Mom is flying solo or why you see Paul around Springfield with a young-ish looking blond woman, it's not his daughter, it's his former mistress/secretary turned girlfriend.

Training, lots of really good training

Taking a quick break for a photo op during our interval ride on Tomahawk.


Since road season has started I've had a number of set backs and they were beginning to feel like they would NEVER end....until now (knock on wood). First it was my bike, I had a crack in my seat-stay, but thanks to Marko Girod, from Trek Bicycles, I have a carbon patch/fix and my frame is in working condition. Next, I had my 2 surgeries. I then got back on the bike and then got sick. I get to feeling better and got back to training again and then had the worst cramp I could EVER imagine at my first set of races...causing pretty bad pain for about 4 or 5 days. Then back in the saddle for a weekend and BAM, sick....AGAIN. So with all this sickness, I've missed a handful of scheduled races, including my first scheduled "team race", NWA Classic. I hated missing this race, but I just didn't think it was a good use of my time, considering my lack of fitness and training, as well as ensuring keeping my health on track, with all my recent sicknesses. However, I was happy to hear my teammates Liz and Rabyne took 1st and 3rd, respectively, so that was a good feeling!

So this past week was a heavy, hard week of training for me. I've been a little suspect of my fitness recently, due to all the set-backs, but I have to say, after this weekend of riding, my confidence is beginning to come back up and I'm feeling quite good.

This is how I remember my workout for the day...this is interval day #2.

This past week included intervals, lots of intervals, along with my longest training ride, to-date. I had back to back days of long intervals (8 and 7 min, respectively) in Zones 5 and Zone 4. Tough stuff, I'm thinking Adam thought so too, as he joined me for the second day of intervals, however surprisingly I felt really strong, despite the super strong Kansas winds that could have gotten the best of me (or us). Saturday, I went out for a long ride with the ladies. Started the morning with Teri and Darcey and then met up with Andrea and Kat. After about 2:40 total training time, the ladies called it a day and I finished out on my own, for a total of 3 hours and 30 minutes...the longest all-time training ride of my life and I couldn't believe it, I felt strong up until 3:10 and still was able to finish it without falling apart, where in the past I've begun to "fall apart" between 2:10 and 2:30. So I'm not sure what it was (maybe the beer or a late night snack at Joe's Pizza), but I can't complain, cause I felt great...and gosh I like this feeling, as it's been awhile.

Sunday was Easter AND the Tour of Flanders. To properly kick-off the epic race, Adam and I hit the road early for a short ride around town, which included a 22% grade (according to my trusty Garmin) cobblestone climb. Yes, 22 effing-percent, on cobbles...(see pics below). Afterwards, we had a lovely Easter "linner" (lunch/dinner) with his family ('rents, Grandma, aunt/uncle and cousins) at M&S Grill. After "linner" we enjoyed a few cocktails with the cousins and then headed home to watch the race. All I can say is, "Cancellara is THE MAN and geeze he made it look easy"!!! Later that evening, we hit the road a second time, for a night ride around Leawood, PV and OP, where we grabbed a quick bite from Jimmy Johns...nothing fast (other than our food order) or too awfully hard, but riding is riding and an easy ride is better than no riding at all, right?

So finally, following all this riding and training, I'm beginning to feel confident about racing on the road this season...yes, finally! I had planned on racing VeloTek Grand Prix next, a short Stage Race, which I was considering a warm-up for Joe Martin, but it turns out it's been cancelled..huge bummer. So, in order to get two days in a row of racing to help prepare, it looks like I'll be heading to STL for the Tour of St. Louis. I'm not gonna lie, I'm a little afraid of what Joe Martin is really going to entail for me. I do know it's quite a bit of climbing, not exactly my forte, but it's getting better. In addition, the race starts out w/a 2.5 mile uphill (small mtn) TT. That's not all...there's a time-cut to continue onto the next stage...so lets cross our fingers that I make it and can finish the whole race. I keep telling myself, as I'm hurting and gritting my teeth during my interval workouts, it's really going to pay-off come the Joe Martin race, so lets cross our fingers that I'm right!

There's been a lot of talk about "sandbagging" lately...

"Sandbagging" by definition means: "To downplay or misrepresent one's ability in a game or activity in order to deceive (someone), especially in gambling". However, the urban dictionary's definition isn't as P.C., it is more appealing: "To generally be douchy by nature and retain excess work to serve his or her best interest." Hey, they used the word "douchy"...seriously, kinda amusing. Anyway, with all this talk of "sandbagging" in the local (Kansas City) cycling scene I felt like weighing in my two cents, where I can, which is right here on my personal blog.

The biggest complaint people are having is that they feel local racers, who are either dominating or are consistently placing well, should be "Cat'ing Up" to the next level. Not that I'm completely disagreeing in all cases, HOWEVER, what I find interesting is that these complaints seem to mostly be based off a racers local results. I can see why those people are frustrated, as they want the chance to finish in the top 10 or podium here at our home-grown races BUT what they don't understand is, once us racers get out of KC and start competing regionally, it's a WHOLE other ball game. Nevermind the fact that if you want to podium, you HAVE to work for it, REGARDLESS of who you're competing against! So first off, stop bitching about getting beat by so-called "sandbaggers"...just get out there and train your ass off till you're faster than them! Ok, I'm moving on from that.

Next, another thing I'm noticing is that people aren't taking what category a person is in, into consideration. It's one thing to jump from a Cat 5 to a 4 or a Cat 4 to a 3, but going from a Cat 3 to a Cat 2 is a HUGE difference. In order to actually race as a Cat 2, you might as well be able to hang with the PROS and if you want to actually COMPETE with them, that's even another level. There are RARELY any races that are strictly Category 2 or even Cat 1/2, most every race you find in this region is Pro 1/2...so let's be real here, let's not go throw some local guys, or women, into Pro 1/2 races that have no business being there. Case in point, myself. Sure, I have the upgrade points to be a Cat 2 racer, sure I have podiumed at some big races over the past year, but can I compete with Pro or even hang with Pro Women...NOPE, I sure can't. So until that day comes where I feel like I can at least finish in the pack of a Pro 1/2 race, I'm hanging as a 3! Not to mention, I'd like to win a few more races before I step into the the Pro 1/2 circuit, cause once I'm there, it's likely it won't happen again! Call that sandbagging, if you will, but I guarantee it will be more constructive for the local racing scene for me to remain as a 3, until I'm damn good and ready to be a 2, as it will make the Cat 3/4 fields stronger and larger in the area and provide more competition, as it will force people to step up their game, in order to compete AND, the best part, I can still race Women's Open races against the other local Cat 1/2 women in the area, when the opportunity is there. Basically what I'm saying is, let's not go suggesting we throw a guy who's won a handful of Spring Flings, by a landslide or not, into a Pro 1/2 race or a guy who can podium consistently here in KC, but the minute he shows up to Tulsa Tough, can't crack the top 20, and tell him he should "Cat the F- up". I realize some of you will argue that men's and women's racing is different and I shouldn't compare the two and yes sure, they are different to a degree, but it's still the same principal. The biggest difference is the size of the fields, clearly the women's fields aren't as big, especially locally, which is all another reason why, I feel, men can hang in a category they are on the edge of upgrading past, longer. They have more opportunity for competition week in and week out. For us women, when we pull up to a line around here, we can look around and pretty much pick the top 5 placements and shuffle their places around a little bit...at least in the men's races you have 30-50-80+ guys to choose from and you just don't know who your top 5 of the day will be. All I'm saying is, don't judge what Category a rider should be in...anyone who is a true competitor is going to place themselves in the "right" place for what they have to work with (ie.time they have for training, which races they are racing, etc, etc..). Disagree with me if you'd like, you have that right, but so do I.

Training Camp, Road Season, Personal Life, etc...

The problem with being so busy is that you neglect the less important things in life, i.e. my blog, however in neglecting it for almost two months now, I have WAY too much to catch up on! So to start out, I'll go back to mid-January, Tulsa Tough training camp.



Just in case I hadn't mentioned it prior, I'm racing for Tulsa Tough for the 2010 road season. I considered it quite an honor when I got the phone call in late September asking me if I had plans for 2010 and that Tulsa would love to have me! I know it's not a big deal to some...but this is only my second season and someone wanted me a part of their women's elite team..so after some debate and weighing my options, I said "yes" and am so glad I did. To kick off the season, we had a team training camp in Tulsa. I went down on a Friday afternoon, started the weekend w/a "social ride", which consisted of both men/women and all levels. Initially when I thought "social ride" I was thinking, slow pedaling around the city and chatting...little did I know that actually meant 1:45-2:00 at 18-19mph..glad I didn't wear my "social" riding attire. After that the weekend consisted of good dinner, racing strategy meetings, power meter training, sponsorship presentations, team tactics, lead-outs, the SondPony for beers, bridging and a total of 8 hours in the saddle between Friday afternoon and Sunday morning...not bad..not bad at all! To top it all off, I had GREAT host-housing at Heidi and Will Gault's house. They are SO very hospitable, I can't say "thank you" enough! And if that couldn't get any better, I got to share a room with another new team member and new friend, Liz Cazer. And because the Gault's are really that neat, they have an entire basement bike shack ready..with 4 bunk beds, plenty of room for multiple bikes and smelly/tired dudes..which is where Jay and Scott stayed. The key part of Jay and Scott is, Jay is one of my favorite/best guy friends that races and Scott, well, I just met him, but he has a really cool thing I referred to as the "Leg Doctor", which he let me use. Jay got a couple short videos of me below using it..kinda funny. I know it looks silly, but man did it help in my recovery.


Leg Doctor Robotics

Monster Leg Doctor Lady

Following camp, I've unfortunately had a few set-backs in my training. As planned, I had 2 surgeries the week I came back, which kept me out of the saddle for 2 weeks. After finally getting back in the saddle and beginning to feel "normal" again, I came down with bronchitis and a sinus infection, which post-poned my first race and kept me out of the saddle another 4 days. Following the time off, I had my first set of road races for the 2010 season this past weekend and not sure I can say they went as planned. I started out by racing the Men's 4s at the Spring Fling..that I was happy with. I was able to hang in the pack the entire race, hang with the surges and ended up averaging 23.2mph, not bad for March and my first race...however towards the end of the race I started getting cramps in different places all over my legs. To make a long story short, I raced immediately after in the Women's 3/4 race and when going for a prime lap, I got out of the saddle and my calf cinched up, I mean so bad that I couldn't move the entire right leg, I felt nearly paralyzed for a minute, as I had no control over that part of my body. Needless to say, I had to pull out of the race and actually have people help me and remove me from my bike. So for the last 3 days, my calf has been tight and painful...not a fun way to start my season again, keeping me out of the saddle for a few days.


Here's a pic of our new SWEET kits!!!


On another note...my personal life, where I've also had a few changes recently. First, a boyfriend - yes, that's right people, I have a boyfriend. I guess I say it that way because though I've "dated" a lot of really cool guys -which whom I'm still friends with the majority of, I have only had a couple of "boyfriends" to speak of..a couple, as in like, 3 since I graduated high school, I believe. Yeah, that's not too many. Anyway, I think most all of my friends know him or of him, but if not, his name is Adam. And yes, he too, rides a bike. Mixing bikes and boys IS the only way. We actually met back at the Halloween cross race, but didn't start kicking things off till New Year's Eve. However, since then, I've had a blast each and every day. Oh and a great bonus in having a boyfriend, when you get muscle cramps in your calves, actually having someone to rub them out for me! Thanks Adam! Did I mention you're the best!?! :) Second, the other big personal change in my life...my living situation. After almost 3 years, and well past due, my roommates are moving out and I'm getting a new roomie. What a breath of fresh air!!! I'm not naming the new "roomie" yet...but there's one lined up, only 1 this time and not only do we both ride bikes, we are actually friends on a day-to-day basis...now that will be a change! :) Anyway, I'm extremely looking forward to that!

Alright, it's late, so until next time....

The end to my first cross season and it turns out, 28 IS great

It's January 11th and thus far, 2010 has been, well, exceptional. I had a great New Years (which has already been discussed), then next came my birthday. Having a birthday January 9th has never been an advantage by any means...always the kid whose party was snowed out, consistently got the combined "Christmas/birthday gift", or people just plain forget, because, well, they are worn out from the holidays...but not this year, not at all! My wonderful friends, Andrea and Robyn, decided to throw me a little shindig at Andrea's house on Friday (1/8)...basically a bunch of girls hanging out, having a few drinks, eating food and some lovely cupcakes from Cupcakes Ala Mode. I couldn't have ask for a better 28th Bday party, with a bunch of down-to-earth gals, of whom I have grown so fond of!



Sat 1/9: My actual birthday was just as great...started my day with breakfast with Robyn and her son, Drake, at The Classic Cookie. Got my Saturday ride in, caught up on life (aka, finally took my Christmas decorations down), 3 loads of laundry knocked out and the house cleaned a bit before my dinner date. Though it seems odd I would fix dinner on my own birthday, it's what I wanted to do...it was so cold that day (the thought of getting out wasn't appealing) AND I was racing Sunday morning- which means a healthy, well-balanced dinner is a must...so tilapia, corn on the cobb, my signature sweet potato fries (they are actually baked) and a strawberry spinach salad....it doesn't get much healthier and balanced than that. My date seemed quite impressed by my skills in the kitchen, though ensured him a few times my cooking skills are far from sub-par and I just choose to cook things I'm good at when I cook for other people...especially dates! ;)

Sunday 1/10: Grote Prijs (final cx race of the season)
I woke up Sunday morning to find it was a whopping -4 degrees and by the time I made it to the venue, it had warmed to about 8 degrees (yes, a heat wave) and by race time it was reported it was 14 degrees. Definitely the coldest weather that I've raced or ridden in, to date. Believe it or not, however, it wasn't near as brutal as I thought it would be...yes it was cold and there was SNOW everywhere, but the sun was shining, it was my birthday weekend and I was bound and determined to make this a fun day/race. To make a long story short (I'm not going to give all the race details) I finished 2nd, behind Kay Lynn (again)...I've wanted so bad to beat her all season and have yet to do it...but don't you worry girl, I'll keep working to get ya next year! Post race, we enjoyed a couple beers- along with a free McDonalds Double Cheeseberger -thanks to some random dude, a warm venue between races and some great racing - if you don't know cross, snow and mud make for the best specatating! What a way to end my birthday weekend...along with kick off 28 - as it is truly great!

Oh and one more thing, I decided to upgrade to a Cat 3 in cross...so as of today, I'm now a Cat 3 road AND cx racer...yay!!!







So now that I can officially say my first season of racing is done and over with, here's an overview:

1. Crit racing is my first love
2. I started the cx season thinking it was "ok"...hated it by the time race #2 had ended, but as time has passed, my bike handling skills have improved dramatically and I've learned how to dress for the weather and now I'm in lust with it, to say the least.
3. After gaining an appreciation for riding and racing in snow and on trails, I may dabble in mountain, as soon as I can afford another bike...though I will ALWAYS be a roadie at heart!
4. Oh and one more thing...I've now officially been training on a bike for one year now...and believe it or not, I've managed to drop 22-23 lbs since October 08' (mind you, I had put on a few LBzzz towards the tail end of my 08' derby season and was at my all time high, but either way, that's alot of weight lost...so THANK YOU cycling!

Next up....Tulsa Tough Training Camp!!!!

Did you know???

I confess, I stole this from my coach's blog...but I liked it so much I had to share...(mind you, this is the 2008 edition).



Does this, at all, make you think about where we are, where we will be or where we are going in sport, as well?

It's 2010...wowzers!

I was reading a few of my other friends blogs and it dawned on me..I should probably, at least, do a recap of 09' and my goals for 10'..which is a weird way to say it..we are all so use to saying "O" "7"; "O" "8"; "O" "9", are we just suppose to say "10"? hmmmm...I'll keep my ears open and follow-up later.

Pics below are of 1st: Bacon Shoe 2nd: Leslie + The Lys...it's how I spent New Years night at the Record Bar. Both solid acts, which goes along with my music reference below.


2009 Recap:
Overall, a successful great year, but of course, a few hiccups here and there. I fell in love with a new sport (cycling in, derby out); had some great successes in that sport - 2nd place seemed to be the theme of the year; made some fantastic new friends (too many to possibly name, though Andrea is sticking out in my mind at this exact moment); my relationship with my sister is the strongest it has ever been (love you, sis); I've continued to expand my musical horizons and discover great local acts and somehow managed to attend a number of concerts from a wide array of music types (non-local shows: The Eagles, Britney Spears, Franz Ferdinand, Coldplay, Kings of Leon, Jet, Flock of Seagulls, Rob Zombie, Swell Season and I think there are more); I dated a some great guys, but nothing stuck - but fortunately we've remained good friends; I did some traveling : L.A. for Coldplay, Toured Missouri - for well, the Tour of Missouri, went to Colorado for a week to hang with Chris and climbed a few mountains; and finally I got picked up by an elite women's cycling team for the 2010 season, Tulsa Tough!



2010 Resolutions...actually, let's just call them goals and we'll go back and check them off in a year from now:
1. Be more productive at work, so I spend less time at the office and more time in the saddle
2. Not only be eligible, but be a legit Cat 2 racer by July
3. Only miss a scheduled workout for catastrophic reasons (i.e. broken bike, sickness, injury, etc...)
4. Lose 10 more L B's ...10 pounds..I'm sitting at 142 (yes, I'll post my weight online, it's fine)..so 132..though if I lose more, that's fine, as long as I don't get below 126 (as that's my ultimate goal race weight)
5. Not sure it's really a goal or resolution, per say, more like something I'd like to add to my so very fulfilled life, but I'd like to fall in love...I haven't been in love (other than with a sport) since my "big break-up" 4 years ago this month, therefore I think it's safe to say, I'm ready.


And one more thing, I'd like to do a recap of the last decade:
2000: graduated high school
00-02': attended Mizzou and started a speed skating team, which I coached
02': moved back home to Springfield to later graduate from Missouri State
03': discovered cycling, by teaching 'spin class'...which later lead to more of an interest
04': graduated from college and got my first "real job" with ZLB
05': transferred from Springfield to KC with ZLB, bought my first place (Lee' Summit, condo) and moved in with my (then) long term boyfriend, JP
06': broke up with long term boyfriend, left ZLB to work for Quintiles and later discovered derby in September
07': derby, derby, derby and more derby...won the 2007 National Championships and was surprisingly picked as the National MVP and purchased house #2
08': broke my wrist celebrating my 26th bday snow boarding, decided I would retire from derby following the end of the season so I could pursue my dreams of being a pro racer
09': entered the cycling scene full blown and placed 2nd at Crit Nationals in the Cat 3/4 race

All I can say is LOTS of changes over the past 10 years...2 graduations, 3 different schools, 3 different cities, 2 "real jobs", 2 houses and encompassed myself in 2 different sports. All I can say is this next decade has a lot to live up to, but I'm looking forward to each and every day and what life may bring me!!!